Advanced help with Children Volume 2

Dealing with a Snubber

What is a snubber?
This is a child with and attitude directed towards an authority figure. Where the child refuses orders, rules, or any contact by displaying an attitude.

What are some examples of a snubber?
A baby that refuses to be handed from one parent to the other, by hanging on for dear life to clothes , hair, arms or legs. This may include screaming, turning their head or shying away.
In toddler children the child may slap at you or run like a Tasmanian devil in the opposite direction.
Grade school kids are greatly known for this on field trips (no matter what arrangements or sacrifices you had to make to get to go). They act as though you aren't even with them, and any rules you have established no longer exists. A very common reaction is the hand and shoulder shrug as if to say "Don't touch me!" One of the first clear signs of the symptoms getting worse is if they back talk you under their breath in public . If your child exhibits this behavior you should be very afraid. (That is the sign of a true risk taker.)
Older children may cross their arms, roll their eyes at the sound of your voice, hide in their room and ignore anything you say. If you did not nip in the bud the first signs above, now your child may not think twice about back talking you to your face.

Anytime you have to use the phrase "Hello, I'm talking to you!"- Your being snubbed!

What can bring on a snubbing?

Most of the time they have no reason and it just slips out like an unexpected fart. (only it stinks worse and lasts longer) Yet, there are many little words or sentences you use, in which it is also triggered.

ex; A simple answer of "No" to Anything!

"It's time to go.."

"Sorry, but we can't buy that today."

"Your not wearing that!"

How Long can I expect the attitude to last?

Babies and toddlers are moment to moment, they can make a 180' change in seconds depending on the situation.

Grade school children usually stop the second they are out of the public eye. After your blood pressure is through the roof and you think your at your wits end, they magically turn into an angel.

In teenagers you just have to wait till they mature through this stage which could take months or even years. Unless of course it was just a sparatic tood, in which you can expect it to come and go monthly.

How can I deal with a snubber?
That depends on the age of the child.
Babies...you can forget it, they are sweet gifts from god and they can do what ever they want. Unless, of course its mommy they are snubbing. Then you tell that little bugger, your the one that did all the pushing in labor not Daddy, and you better not start that attitude!
Toddlers... They have a short attention span. Let them run it out and eventually they remember who feeds them. Can't wait that long? Empty promises of candy or ice cream is a great trick.
Grade school children...One short trip to the bathroom or a threatening whisper can be a great public advantage. Usually the threat of telling daddy is more than enough, but the use of guilt can be the most important tool.
Teenagers...If you did not catch the snubber earlier, now your just screwed! Your only hope is bribery and money at this point.

No matter what the age it makes you feel unwanted and like crap.

You will just have to use reverse psychology and ignore them and how it makes you feel.

Expect at times to be hated and at other's to be the best mom ever!

It's just another one of Motherhood's great perks.

For further questions or concerns. Contact the Motherhood in crisis hot line at 1-911-MOM-HELP, or through my contact info. in the sidebar.

Advanced help with chlidren Volume 1

The Shooing Method

What is the Shooing Method?
A Technique used with children while you are on the phone, to signify you are busy and they need to leave. In which you motion with your hand in a very stern manner for them to go away.

(techniques may very from pointing, to a slight nudge in one direction or waving)

When is the method used?
The technique is used when all other methods have failed.
Other methods include; Warning them of all consequences before getting on the phone, Quietly telling them to wait when on the phone, and signing with your finger over your mouth to Shh!

Signs of Failures ; They continue to talk (maybe even louder)or gain your attention by following you, getting in your face, and/or tugging on your clothes.

When can I expect to use this method?
Anytime you need to make an important phone call, or if the phone rings in general. Any whisper of adult conversation can alert small children to coming running in need. (Note, no consideration will be given, even if it is the only phone call you have had all day. In a such case, You should also expect your call waiting alert to begin at this time. Be advised this technique does not apply nor is it effective to solicitors.) At this time you will loose all control of the quiet civilized household, you had two minutes before the phone rang.

Is this method effective?
In all case studies this method has been proven 100% non-effective. The child will continue with annoyance the same as compared to a fly at a picnic table. Although still using the technique is your common reaction of instinct. There have been severe cases in which the mother has to be air-vacted for immediate mental evaluation and counseling.

What can I expect after all techniques are applied and the phone call has ended? Usually, The child's behavior immediately turns from from little devil to sweet angel, to avoid any expected punishment. All crying, fighting and needs will diminish as though they never existed. Leaving you to frustrated and frazzled in confusion as to what you need to do next.

For further questions or concerns. Contact the Motherhood in crisis hot line at 1-911-MOM-HELP, or through my contact info. in the sidebar.