Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Now I peek out the blinds before I answer

There's just something unethical about answering the door to a man saying, "You want to come look at my meat!" (That's some introduction, isn't it ?!)
Can you believe it? I know! Here I am about to run back in the house for the gun, and slummy Ole Jethro starts talking about cooking steak! Thank goodness is all I have to say. I would imagine the look on my face said it all. Cooking was the last thing I figured he had on his mind.I'm sure in fear of screams, he immediately started his backwards redneck sales pitch.

Now tell me, what woman in their right mind is going to answer the door to that and say "Oh sure just come on in and show me your meat." ( I'm a lonely house wife. Just let me put the kid away and you can flop out your meat. Yeah baby! uh..EW!! )
What fool drives around in a beat up pick-up truck selling meat out of a freezer? (A fat, toothless, uneducated one apparently) More importantly who buys meat in a freezer out of a beat up old pick up truck? That's my question. It certainly isn't going to be me! (The guy who showed up with a spray bottle and a rag didn't fool me and neither will you!) Thanks, but I am perfectly happy taking chances with my life, paying full price at the grocery store. Now please get your crappy old junk meat off my property and move it along, before I go all Kung-Fu panda on your a$$!

That does it I'm converting to a vegan and the children will have to have another talk about strangers in the neighborhood.


  1. Yuck, yuck yuck!!!

    I wonder if he makes enough money to cover his gas in his truck. You should ask your neighbors if they bought meat from that guy.

    Seriously I can't imagine eating meat from a guy at your door. He probably hit the deer/moose/cow/duck/goose with the big truck and is trying to get money for it to fix his bumper. HEHEHE

  2. OMG! I can't stop laughing! Love your sense of humor and the fact that there is some weird guy in a truck selling meat! Too funny!

    I agree about the whole "naked with panties" thing. Thanks for stopping by my blog!

  3. I can't imagine that he would think (looking like he sounds) that anyone would buy anything from him anyway! I've heard about people that do that, but I sure as heck wouldn't buy it!! Go Kung-Fu Panda!! ;0)

  4. That is so nasty but I've heard about this before. Gross. I have a hard time buying meat on sale because I think it may be close to expired. Out of a, NO!

    Just come on in and show me your meat- that line made me spit coffee everywhere! LOLOLOL!

    We have these traveling meat showmen here too. LOL And for the love of God I would work at McDonalds before I would strap on a freezer and sell mystery meat to complete strangers.

    But whatever floats their boats.

    OH, and I didn't promise the hub a little sumpin sumpin...LOL I did threaten great bodily harm and the LACK of sumpin` sumpin's in the future.


  6. I've had WAY too many of those guys at my door! Funny post.

  7. Wait a minute... A younger version of the meat guy was in my neighborhood a few weeks ago! Thank goodness my hubs was home to take care of him! EEK

    It was a different story when the cancer insurance salesman came...

  8. That post is too funny!
    I get lots at my door to but not as funny! lol


Girls could you PLEASE give our guest some space. Take your brother and go play. Sorry,it's hectic here, what were you saying?"...

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