If I only could write my Aunt Flow a letter to tell her how I really feel;
Dear Aunt Flow,
Each and every month I wait and anticipate your arrival. Counting down the days until that dreaded moment, when you first appear. Days before you come I start to prepare, shopping for each and everything I will need while you are here. You always stay way past your welcome. It makes it so hard to plan when you are here, not knowing when you will disappear. Your such an inconvenience, with the disruption you bring. Little things that never bother me are now a monumental nuisance, from the hormonal tizzy you bring on. I'm no longer myself and turn into some crazy eyed witch, taking out my irritability and anger on everyone around me. I've got a headache already and I'm not looking forward to your cramping style. No sex, no thongs just water retention, and temptations of chocolate. Why why why... must you come? I'd find away to get rid of you, but I know that might make things worse! Seeing how you did provide my three babies, I guess I can put up with you for a few more years. I'm getting older and soon you'll be dead and I can dance on your grave! (or at least I can jump on my menopausal cycle and ride over you!)
Looking and waiting for you ~
We are eagerly waiting Aunt...
ReplyDeleteOMG-It's ADORABLE in here! Well, except for your Aunt.
ReplyDeleteYou know, it never was a really big deal until I hit 40. Now I'm about the meanest little witch you'll ever meet for a few days a month...then I feel like crap for another week. How is it that basically two weeks a month are ruined for me? I hate it! (And the knowledge that I had five babies still doesn't make it any better!) :)
ReplyDeleteAunt Flo sucks... there is no other way to describe her. While she's in town, I literally feel like ripping out my uterus (I know, so vulgar, but my cramps are pretty bad). Hope she comes and leaves quickly!
ReplyDeleteMy hubby thinks the 'Aunt Flow' thing is funny. Seriously, I think if I die after we have a girl, but before she hits puberty, he's going to tell our daughter about Aunt Flow in those terms exactly. "Honey, once a month, you'll be getting a visit from an aunt you've never met before. And she will turn you into a very nasty person, but don't worry, Daddy will still love you."
ReplyDeleteI often ask the same thing, why? Can't it just stop now, I have had all the kids I want. Whats the point?
ReplyDeleteI have a great time reading your blog, wish i could write that well, you are very entertaining!!!! At this time in my life I needed that, I am turning 49 this month, keep entertaining me!!!! lol
ReplyDeletePear asks me all the time if we can just take out all of my plumbing and be done with it. I guess I get a little cranky too.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Gayle - no issues - EVER until I hit 40. I had the easiest road ever with cycles - no cramps, no bloating, no nithg, 2 days and I wasd done. Now, forget it, I turn into someone I don't even know! Out of no where - I will be ticked off for no reason. I hate it!!!! Pamprin does NOT work. I feel like taking BC again to not have to deal with this utter nonsense!
ReplyDeleteMy Aunt Flo is much much uglier and meaner. Yours almost looks like she has a sweet side. LOL!!
ReplyDeleteOh. I get it. Took me a minute.
ReplyDeleteDuh. ;)
SS
I'm all done with my Aunt Flo she was mean and nasty so I kicked her out a few years ago. Good riddance!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad I'm not the only one anxious for menapause.
ReplyDeleteShe really is such a nuisance...for a week or so every month I loathe being a girl...
ReplyDeleteYour letter is perfect. Aunt Flow has shown up for the first time since conception of my third (and last) child. I swear this is the worst visit in the entire 20yrs she has been visiting me. I think I have offically scared my husband...
ReplyDeletei had a rollerball ablasion done on my uterus. i still pms but aunt flo has been kicked to the curb permanently. you should look into it if you don't want any more kids.
ReplyDeleteI told you not to use that picture of me in this post. Can't I trust you with anything?
ReplyDeleteOK..you are soooooo going to love this...you think it is bad....you waiting for Aunt Flo to come..once a month...for her short stay with YOU...well.....ok...I wait for Aunt Flo....she comes to stay with me...leaves me and usually the very same day...moves in with my partner :(....then...while visiting her...she is two-timing....and visits my 17 year old daughter...then my 14 year old daughter shortly after...so....there is like 1 peaceful, safe, moodless week in our house..and let me just say...this week is it!!! :) hehehehe :)
ReplyDeleteYou are such a great writer!
ReplyDeleteAnyway I may be out of the loop by saying I'm 23 and I love Aunt Flow, for she is the only thing stable in a crazy crazy world.
Whenever I have an oopsie, she is always there to assure me that It won't be this time that the ovulation begins on my future snot nose kids. So I am free to live another day that is so young, happy and free.
reading this made me laugh and i had to share your blog wit a friend of mine whos currently suffering from "aunt flow"
ReplyDeleteshe loved it
wonderful pic too!