Sunday, November 11, 2007

That’s IT, No more Babies…..

After having two precious little girls, my husband and I decided to try again. Once I was pregnant with Jacob I knew my sports car days were over. I adjusted to the fact of having to submit myself to a SUV, boy was that a change. That was a sad day selling my convertible camaro. I still can’t bring myself to be like all those other moms I see on the road. I don’t have the bumper sticker that says “Mom’s Taxi” , or the baby on board sign hanging in the window. In fact you will never see me driving a mini van or station wagon and wearing mom jeans! That image doesn’t exactly scream Hot mamma to the hubby. I’m a wanna be Sexy fun wife/mom .One of the whole reasons I refuse to have another little one, because my Tahoe can’t fit another car seat. I have enough against me without all that. I just refuse to let go anymore of my youth. Turning 30 this year was bad enough. The pregnancy hormones at the time made sure of that. All and all the hormones I could deal with. Or I should say my husband could deal with. Crying for no reason, worrying about everything under the sun, and my brain turning to mush. He never knew how I would be or what stupid thing I would do next. Like putting the milk in the cabnit or throwing away his paycheck by accident. (That was one fun day digging through trash outside). But seeing how that was the least he had to go through, I don’t feel so bad. I’m telling you I thought after going through two prior pregnancies , I’d be a pro this time around. I expected to be sick, emotional , gain weight and all the other little woes of being pregnant. Little did I know what would be to come. I brushed up on all the new books, articles ect … Oh yes they all say every pregnancy is different yada yada . Let me explain some of the things they don’t tell you, and some new things I went through. This time I had feckles the size of moles suddenly appear. I added a little extra makeup and went on , no big deal. Well then my right hand constantly went numb. Something that the Dr.’s never could explain. Nerves I never knew exists were now killing me. Try a shooting pain up the side of your jaw up your face, with every contraction. I didn’t know which pain was worse . Another thing those darn books failed to mention.
During the birth I thought, it would be as easy as my girls were. I wasn’t in much pain, so I ended up Waiting too late to have any kind of pain medication ! Big mistake, they should mandatory all woman to have a epidural! Let me assure you Forget any prior pregnancies and pretend it’s your first! Be scared out of your mind and do anything and everything to a sure you will have an easy time. See, I was just spoiled my first two which were cake walks. No pain and no meds …. Not this time around. Although, ask my husband and it was like ordering fast food. Fast and easy! I don’t think so, here I am having a near death experience and all he had to do was stand at the bed catch the baby! Pushed out a 7.5lb baby boy and I thought the worst was over. It may have been the worst but not everything was over. I still had a numb hand for a solid month. I now magically had a unexpected perm added to my straight long hair. Which would have been nice had I actually went to a beauty shop. Nope this one came free with baby, go figure. And here all I was expecting was a free gift bag. Now I spend an hour every morning straightening my hair. Once I quit breastfeeding at 3 months because of problems, I started going bald, so I thought. My thick luscious pregnancy hair was now falling out. Oh I’m not talking about a little falling out as they claim in the books. Clumps of hair!! We had hair balls everywhere. They were all over my clothes. So, with every wash my husband had to pick out the hair clumps found in his underware. Needless to say he wasn’t too happy. Ending breastfeeding not only ruined my hair , but my once full Big Boobs were now gone. I’m not talking back to regular size. They got the life sucked out of them and so they become shriveled up little prunes. I surely don’t remember seeing that stated in any book. Then he had to deal with my crying AGAIN. He comes in “ What wrong?” , “Gee I don’t know I have nothing to wear, my hair is dry, I’m going bald and I have NO boobs. I just feel SO pretty !!!!! All he can do stand there looking at me like I’m crazy. Why?? Because he can’t possible ever understand. Men have it so easy, no periods no nothing! Here’s my title for the next big pregnancy book. ‘ You’re a Total Mess ...taking out the sugar coating of being pregnant’ .
So, if you’re like me. Just keep telling yourself “Give it time, you just had a baby”! Everything your going through is worth it. Listen to all the giggles in the background and wait for your hubby to come home and make it all better. Even if he really doesn’t understand. You can at least smile at him and think “ He wouldn’t have survived the first cramp!”.

1 comment:

  1. I know a lot of this wasn't supposed to be funny Jo!.... but the shriveled up prune boobs and going bald just made me hit the floor rolling big time!!!! ROFL

    I really miss you!!!!



Girls could you PLEASE give our guest some space. Take your brother and go play. Sorry,it's hectic here, what were you saying?"...

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